Reader Kerry asked this question in a comment on my previous post, The Etiquette of LinkedIn Invitations.

When the name of someone I know pops up in the update section as 'John Smith has just joined linkedin' I tend just to make a mental note of that but not jump right over to ask for a connection, even if it's someone I know quite well. It seems a bit intrusive to me. Linked In didn't have that sort of display when I joined several years ago, and I think I might have found it a bit disconcerting to find that people knew I'd joined. I've also found that when people are inexperienced with LI they don't know how to respond, technically, to such a request even if they want to. But what do you think? Is it more welcoming to invite someone immediately?

That's a great question, Kerry! And, like with most aspects of social media, one that has no single "right" answer. But here are my thoughts on the matter.

First, let me say that I joined LinkedIn about five years ago when a former co-worker sent me an invitation. The note was just the standard, "I'd like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn" or some variation of that—I don't even know if people had the option of editing the message back then.

At the time, I had never heard of LI and, since the message had that auto-generated feel to it, I actually thought it was some kind of spam. But I contacted my friend through regular e-mail to check it out and discovered it was really a "thing" and I connected with her. I have NO idea how long it was after that before I added anyone else to my network or did anything with the service at all.

The reason I told that story is to illustrate the changes that have occurred in terms of social media over the last several years. Back then, I thought I was being spammed. Today, I interact with LinkedIn on a daily basis, whether it's just to read what my friends are doing, see what's happening in groups I belong to, or to search for freelance opportunities.

So, back to your question, my thought is that when people now sign up with LinkedIn (or Facebook or Twitter or...), they expect that SOMETHING's going to happen, even if they're not quite sure what. So while I understand your point about it being "disconcerting," I would say if you see someone has joined that you know fairly well, I think you would be doing him a favour to send a message asking him to join your network. (I probably would wait a while if it was just an acquaintance, though.)

If you do decide to invite a "newbie", I'd suggest keeping the following points in mind:

• As I mentioned in my earlier post, I think you should always personalize the invitation message. But it's even more important with people who are new to the service to make them feel like you really want to connect with them.
• I would also make a point of acknowledging that LI can be confusing and somewhat overwhelming at first, and offer to answer any questions they may have (or send them my way :), and start by telling them how to respond to your request!
• If you have mutual friends on LI, let the new person know, so he can start building up his own network. I know some people feel awkward when they see people with hundreds (or more) connections and they're sitting there with their "measly" three or four.
• Point people to groups that may be of interest. That's a really good way to lurk on LI for a while to see how different people interact with each other, without any pressure to make any moves of their own.

Here are two posts I've written about LI that I think would be especially helpful to new users:

The INs of LinkedIn

The Etiquette of LinkedIn Invitations

Thanks again for the comment and the question, Kerry. I'd be very interested in hearing other people's points-of-view on the topic so, if anyone wants to add something, feel free to either add a comment or shoot me a note and I'll update the post.

Posted in Etiquette, LinkedIn, My Two Cents, Reader Questions